Understanding The Love Languages as a tool for becoming a better lover (and citizen). I once dated a man as generous with his compliments...

Years ago I was, like many of us now during CoronaVirus isolation, getting to know a man I’d met online through text and phone conversati...

Has social isolation made you reconsider your loving priorities? Just as CoronaVirus was overwhelming the world, I burst into tears while...

The last time I took a pregnancy test, my partner sat next to me on the edge of the tub and we held our collective breath waiting for tha...

"If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me." W.H. Auden Last year I made a simple, low risk New Year’s resolution: I wo...

We humans have always licked each other's genitals. It's our attitude about oral sex which has changed over the centuries. The first time...

Does being polyamorous require a particular personality? The first time a man I was dating confirmed he’d slept with another woman, a suc...

The Special Sauce of love may simply be staying fascinated with your partner I used to have a few rules about the men I ‘liked’ on dating...

I waffle between a sense of admiration for a person who has discovered a kink that brings them joy, yet wonder what horrible event in early

My love influencers are coming from unlikely places Awhile back I took a stab at assessing the health of one’s relationship based on whet...

Too often when love ends, the people who adore us will insist we’re still wonderful and the person who left us the idiot. Think again.

I decided early on that God was not so perverted to bless us with orgasms then expect us not to have them.

High on love or felled by loss? It's simply temporary insanity I once developed a crush on a married man so consuming I could barely func...

Not every marriage is worth saving. But no marriage deserves to be abandoned during the most stressful point in its lifetime. I recently ...

"No woman gets an orgasm by shining the kitchen floor." Betty Friedan I had my first orgasm, age 14, staring up at the sky outside my bed...

It doesn't get any better than dating at midlife. Trust me If I were a drinking buddy of ‘Stella Gray’, The Guardian newspaper’s 50 year-...

Is the one who strays the only cheat? 2018 was my year of dubious honor. The New York Times publish my essay, ‘What Sleeping With Married...

Is your relationship stable? Consider its chemistry.

Sex takes time to learn under the best of circumstances. These are not the best of circumstances.

(This essay first appeared in Modern Love for the New York Times) I’m not sure it’s possible to justify my liaisons with married men, but...